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Madelyn Kubin was a Kansas farm woman who reduced his own poor health to care for her husband after he suffered a debilitating stroke. She related their experience through writing letters to her daughter. There are many lessons for all caregivers in Madelyn's experiences. Here are three, illustrated with excerpts of the book Letters of Madelyn, Chronicles of a Caregiver:

Write a Rant

Write about your anger, fear and frustration can get the feelings Negative head. When you allow anger to the role that intense emotional energy release.

Writing this rant did not change the situation Madelyn, but she was able to change the position of his attitude after blowing off a little steam:

"I had reached a stage where everything related to Quentin irritated me.
I hated the way they huffed and puffed when he got into bed. It did not start my morning runs to the right to get out of bed and step into a depend in large wet.

I wanted to scream when he sat down to watch me put the orange juice, medicines and vitamins, etc. on the table. And then when I come with the toast, who acted as if he were surprised that it was time for breakfast. It made me angry that I would have to wait and wait as he struggled to get their chair in law.

I do not have time to remember and list all other irritants, but I can tell you everything that aggravates me.

I realize that stroke has affected him in many ways that are not evident. I also know he is definitely not that way by choice and it is not trying to irritate me.

I think it is important "To do unto others as you would have them do unto you." That is why they do not want to cross him. I also realize that someday I could be in worse condition than he. It would be horrible to be fighting with every little thing and that her caregiver and others cross with you, so I adjusted my attitude, and today I feel a little better.

Stay connected with family, friends and organizations

It is not unusual invitations to social functions to stop once a person is diagnosed with a chronic illness. As a caregiver must be proactive and innovative to ensure that is not isolated.

In this letter, Madelyn tells how she became a regular meeting at a party:

"Our group has a grant to carry on after lunch month. I decided I would have to come to the farm this time, and I've had more fun getting ready for them. Except for being a bit of wind, was a morning perfect. I sprayed the yard with patio Guard and there was no fly or mosquito in sight. There were 24 of us.

Quentin was there and had great fun. He was sitting with some particularly interesting. I regret not having a picture of him with the happy expression on his face. It is something that triggers memories of the past, but it is very rare now. The experience is something like the feeling you get playing golf - a good blow makes a person want to go back and try again. I will be trying thinking about things I had to do so you can see that expression again. "

Accepting that death is part of life

We all we know that death is inevitable but can be very difficult to discuss. Talking openly can remove some of the mystery and fear and open the door to some meaningful conversations.

Madelyn wrote:

"On the fourth anniversary of the coup de Quentin was very depressed. I was convinced he would die that night, and he wanted. When we went to bed I said I did not know what would happen at night, but if I woke up and was having a problem, he wanted me to try to get back to sleep and leave it alone.

He woke up alive and very cheerful in the morning.

Never get excited about the premonitions of death in the way my mother did. Dad would make her jump through a hoop, when he began to mourn and say that he was dying. I made three trips to Florida one year. She called me crying and upset him. Frankly, I never made much sense to me, as there had been a Nice black dress at the bottom of the closet to wear to his funeral since 1946.
Once, I went to Florida when dad started crying and telling me he was going to die. I said I thought the death was one of the best things that God had planned for us. Him said it would be terrible to think that a person would have to go on forever in a body that was hurting and did not function well. I still feel that way. Left to mourn, while I was there.

Madelyn Kubin survived her care experience by taking care of herself physically, mentally and spiritually. Although not There is nothing that can make the job easy care, write a diatribe, engaging in social interaction, and talk openly about death can help alleviate some stress.

About the Author:

Elaine K. Sanchez, author of the tender, gritty, and uproariously funny book, Letters from Madelyn, Chronicles of a Caregiver speaks to audiences across the country about finding hope and humor in aging, illness, and long-term caregiving. For a free Caregiver’s Survival Guide, visit her website at http://www.LaineyPublishing.com

Article Source: ArticlesBase.com - Overpowering the Demands of Caregiving - Lessons From Madelyn

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